PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
The men handing out bibles on the quad are blatantly skipping me... am i that obvious
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
I've never had a woman show me her venereal disease results in a bar before.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I was so drunk, I was kissing everyone. Their sexual preference was none of my concern.
No teenage boy ever gets scared away from sex unless she is slipping a wedding ring on your finger or is killing your cat. I promise.
We have to have sex twice when i get back. I miss you sex, and thank god the nhl lockout is over sex. I will happily let you wear your sharks jersey during it and i will wear my ducks jersey, and it will be mad rivalry sex.
Send me one of your boob pics as an example. I mean this in the straightest least lesbian way possible.
This is my gift to your gina
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
Your final is gonna be as easy for you as getting into straight girls' pants is for me.
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
I'm surronded by jorts. You're probably too drunk to care. I'm gonna cry now. Love you.
Randomize
