Dude, she's so old there's a chalk outline where her reproductive organs used to be.
Fuck their fairy tale bullshit. I shall ruin it. With a few thrusts of my cock.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
It was like a lincoln log. Seriously. I don't know who's more pissed, me or my vagina...worst.hookup.ever.
We made a drinking game out of Project Runway. Gay guys are so fun.
Midnight run for medical supplies ended several hours later with a lapdance to the Braveheart soundtrack.
Jazzercise themed birthday pub crawl. 6 bars in 6 hours.everyone was a hot mess.
I gave you a lap dance in a bowling alley... And I was Fine?
Due to the events of st patties day last year I created a moral and ethical policy so that I won't get kicked out of the bar again. It mostly consists of not wearing pants so then I don't take them off at the bar.. and subsequently get kicked out.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
What's an appropriate gift to bring to my boyfriend's wife's baby shower?
Shame?
Randomize
