do you think i can make that microwavable cake stuff with vodka instead of water?
you should probably use water
i dont have any
so I have this game called 14 beers left. and we both have to drink 7 before we leave
Ive had to apologize to every girl i know today because of you
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
Using our apartments online floor/space planner to see how many beer pong tables we can fit. Dont think they had this in mind when they put this thing online.
Probably not lol but were fitting as many as possible
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
I just sent a snapchat of my boobs for Adderall. It's finals season.
You're the only person I know that could get laid while visiting their grandpa in florida
I want to be "performing a disservice to society by actually wearing clothes in public" hot.
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Wait..I'm drunk and butt naked making a pizza. Happy Wednesday.
Topless Tuesday? One of us will be really happy the other not so much.
Remind me later when I want to buy more drinks that there's a 20 in my bra
Randomize
