there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
Just saw a woman walking a golden retriever and a vacuum down the road. I miss downtown.
You went from loaded cattleman, to football player, to better football player, to art major from Missouri. Your future was looking so good for a while.
Remember when we pinky swore we'd never feel hungover alone...
just found out they live across the street from coke dealers... rethinking the new years resolution
its the kind of night you break several limbs and say you were lucky
4 out of 7 roommates in one month isn't that bad if you think about the fact that 3 of them were in the last 24 hours
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
you know its getting late when the "nevers" are turning into "maybe"
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
Will u lay on an air mattress with me and drink vodka while we listen to Rick James?
I'm literally trying to cool beer down right now in my car by putting it on my floor and blasting cold air on it
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
I love you, but seriously, that was way too long a thesis on an Arby’s curly fry being wrapped around schlong!
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