Dude I just figured out the mystery flavor of airhead is vodka sprite, no way i'm wrong
I don't even know why I got my vag waxed
Ugh, tell me about it. As each day passes and the hair grows more, I get a little more depressed.
Your sister reminds me of me at her age. Stop her while you can.
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
every single time I see a picture of the two of them on facebook, I want to just call her and scream "your boyfriend said I give the best head on the east coast". But I've been told that would be inappropriate.
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
Passed out on the bench in the men's bathroom. Feel much better now.
I fucked a guy that's in Sports illustrated. I'm officially ready for college.
Good morning love! Friendly reminder that we decided to make leggings with a vagina zipper. "For the winter quickie"
I’m almost positive this girl is drinking a mojito in class right now, if so she’s my new hero
can I cover your dick in cookie butter?
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
I assure you, it was not a Porn Hub Bee Movie parody.
and i walked downstairs to find my brother using nunchucks, and making the appropriate noises. i simply asked "why"; his reply? "why the fuck do you think?". i love my family.
my face feels like mints and my body feels like tingles
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