i'm watching the fashion show on bravo
you're cheating on project runway?
if you can't score coke, you buy crack.
when did we get to this "texting at random" level on friendship?
Is it weird that I miss finding cum in my bed?
you went around and groping mens pants to see "which was worthy" of you to go home with.
The new google images is a smorgasbord of porn now are plans for tonight are off.
She puked in the bank of America parking lot? Awesome.
Yeah, figured I'd deposit my check while we were there.
i lnow ive slrrwsdy teted you this. but goddamn girl on tv is a good song
im youtubing treadmill accidents. this is what i do at 2:10am
He was drinking a long island through his Breathalyzer tube.
Im sorry for drunkenly throwing your phone into the ocean. At the time it seemed like a good way for you not to text him
Ok, I have three hours. I'm trying to work out two blow jobs and a taco.
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
The only thing he told me before he passed out was that he is from Buffalo and I'm a bitch.
Why can I remember how tall Nicki Minaj is from looking up her height once months ago, yet after weeks into the semester I can't even remember where any my classrooms are located
Importance
Is it sad that I just pissed sitting down so I didn't have to stop eating doritos?
Randomize
