I just saw how many times I called you last night. You're welcome.
Dude, she DOES look like she'd give good head. No bottom jaw, I checked.
Woke up to a denim duvet cover this morning... why r guys so tacky?
It was literally the size of a half eaten tic tac.
Honestly, I don't care whether it was a guy or a girl. Best blowjob ever.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
Yesterday was just the icing on the rejection cake that was my week
What should I say back?
Well, how do you want the conversation to go?
Straight into my pants.
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I ate her out in the bathroom and she did my makeup. Man i love being a lesbian
I told him I'd ride his broomstick if he let me call him Harry Potter and drew a lightning bolt on his forehead.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Randomize
