You would DIE at the bar we're at right now. All indian/asian med students, I swear
Asian doctor ratio. So hot. I would've gone into heat
Last night he was fingering me with one hand to his ear, calling himself 'dj clittles'
Thats what happens when go home with guys that wear shutter shades to the bar..
I'll trade you a raw potato for some vodka
Andrew is trying to convince me that i took your virginity. Please tell me he is lying.
define virginity.
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
i found you in bed eating fish fillets dipped in chocolate pudding
Nothing quite like walking through a spider web on your way back in from smoking to fuck up a perfectly good high.
it's ok, no one ever died fom being sticky.
i've gotta research that and get back to you.
sorry I blacked out our whole relationship
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
He wrote on the bartenders notepad "phone?" So I wrote back "911"
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
I fuckin love you!
I would reciprocate the feeling if i knew who this was.
He saw my Halloween/ Costume closet and assumed I’m into cosplay. I’m going with it. What’s sexier, a cop or a nurse?
Randomize