the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
After we fucked, her eye wouldn't stopped twitching and she could only move her hand, which she used to put her number in my phone
You insisted I take photos of you vomiting off the top of the tree.
I think it's a friendship ring and the other part is on his cats collar
I really hope jumping jacks prevent pregancy because I'm kind of banking on it right now, do you know why there's a unicycle in the corner of my room?
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
He just took a bite of each taco bell burrito and hid them throughout my apartment. this was 2 weeks ago and have found 30 burritos so far
Anddon't worry about me I have my Darth Vader flashlight
I'm pmsing and only have one functional foot
Checking out a dudes' nachos instead of the dude #foreveralone
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
you are the only girl i know that would bring a plate of cookies to a hook up. but they were awesome. thanks. next time cupcakes?
Okay so my roommate deals some drugs so whenever he leaves we can hook up, be ready
I didn't know I was the on call booty call damn
Come cuddle! I'll be passed out somewhere in the library. It'll be like a scavenger hunt!
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