i'm pretty confident that i watched a woman making love to a german shepherd.
hdsncx Gizmo asnqw toilet blanasdi
ok, stay where you are, be there soon
Jennifer and I just ate like 4 jello shots w/ a guy dressed as inspector gadget. We are still in the capital building btw
I love Texas.
If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
You cheat on me once, shame on me. You cheat on me with a white girl, it's fucking over
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
Tell him next time im gonna be "disgrace to the family" drunk
It was all cool until he grabbed my vag and started screaming: THIS IS MINE.
Even her dad came up for the body shots. Wasn't sure what to do so I just laid there and let it happen...
Finished sriting an apology letter to my liver 2 weeks before st. Patricks game on
Singing high school musical songs with an old Russian woman I met on the bus. What are you doing?
Speaking of boners I learned how to say " jizz everywhere" in sign language
I'm eating your cookies as payment for having to listen to you. Happy sex
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
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