so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
The Swedes wanted a tensome.
Plus my stomach has been speaking through my ass all day sending notes saying "fuck you" and "this is from your liver" or "i will kill you."
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
You're on Grindr at the STD clinic. I love you.
My public calorie counter app is pretty much just a cry for help.
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Because her vagina is one of those illusive black holes that leads to a parallel universe where he is king and the sea is made of beer! That is why they are together!
LISTEN TO ME! GAY. FIREFIGHTER. They are the most rare and precious kind of gay. The kind little gays dream of. It needs to happen.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Knowing that porn stars want to fall in love is the weirdest thing I've found to be beautiful recently. I'm so lonely.
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
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