apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I drove you home. there is no excuse for wrecking your car 3 hours later.
Weird shit dude, I just realized that the girl I fucked last night looks like Shaun White's twin sister. I dunno if I should be scared or turned on
I hope her Double McTwist was as good as his
It looks alright. The blow up doll is in the microwave, and she has forks in her ass
apologized to him about 10 times for being drunk. told him about 15 times that he was "really pretty"
And I can taste the vodka through my ears. Good god.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
I feel that shower jager is exactly what this man needs after last night.
You're a disgrace to gay men everywhere.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
Sorry about the Christmas balls dude. At the time I thought they were festive as fk but I see now I've just spent too much time on the internet
DESTROY DICK DECEMBER\nTHE SUN SHINES ON THE THIRSTY
I feel so accomplished. I've cleaned my room, done laundry, called those places, gotten jobs, and masturbated.
I'm so proud of you.
So random question: what's a good way to tell your brother that his Skype sex kept you awake last night? I'm not really sure how that conversation begins.
Randomize
