Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
So I was just looking through the calendar on my phone seeing what day new years was on & on dec 31st at 9am it says "nude champagne toast". Guess we have to do it.
you went around the entire night in your french maid costume dusting off the "cob webs" on everyone's crotch saying "you havent gotten any action in a while"
I was wondering why i got so many friend requests the next day...
Trust me I was high for like 5 years...I got this
I think I need to donate blood to see if I have Hepatitis. Again.
doing shots of $6 a bottle whiskey and chasing it with milk. my own personal way of saying fuck life.
I'm not so good at organized events that don't revolve around whiskey or playgrounds.
I kinda wanna Instagram the giant vag stain on my sheets. That is something to be proud of. It's a Christmas miracle.
she opened a can of olives, drained the juice and poured ranch dressing in. oh and 'croutons' (saltines) on top...
MESSY REBOUND SEX HERE I COME! Time to start stretching to fit in my back seat again ...
If you could get me there thatd be perfect. I doubt there's extradition on the moon.
It smells like grilled cheese and sexual frustration
You’re like one of those doomsday preppers, but for your vagina
I am going to constantly be reminded of you for the next couple of days because of how sore my vagina is. It's just the price I have to pay.
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