I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
I convinced a girl to do a shot of salsa someone fell through the whole on the porch and Sara swallowed a beer tab
Sorry about the voicemail last night, people in hostel thought getting the clap from cheating on me wasn't enough and you hearing a 6 foot 5 Swedish dude bang the shit out of me was needed.
TAKE ALL THE MAERHMALLOWS AND PUT THEM ALL IN THE MAGICAL NIGHTSTAND
Na Im fine, just need to un-grow this vagina I've developed
I HAVE A BLACK EYE FROM A DILDO!! IM GETTING MARRIED TOMORROW! THIS IS NOT A MISSUNDERSTANDING!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Well after we were arrested you just kept chanting "Like a good neighbor state farm is there"
Explain why there's a meatball in my bong
I'm at a first year old's birthday party and a midget dressed as a cop just showed up. Word is we're going to toss and bowl with him. Updates to come.
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
like I'd leave you in a situation like that..pfft. what kinda friend do you think I am?
...a stoned one.
I'm stuck on a cliff. I'm not sure how I got here or how to get down. Please send help. And clothes.
Randomize
