when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
I sold 10 pepperonis for 5 dollars last night....i fucking love drunk people
I just woke up to people screaming "funnel" in my kitchen....
Happy St. Patrick's Day.
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
Note to self: You can't deep fry cheese-its.
The cleaning lady has a form she makes me sign every time she finds me passed out in my office so she can keep track of how much to charge me each month for keeping quiet about it.
Nothing like being buzzed at 10:20am off wine shots in Amish country
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
moms trying to set me up with a 28 year old. hes graduated university like im getting high in my bed and he's an adult
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
His flight was delayed by two hours though. I just got cock-blocked by clouds :(
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
Probably should start having regular sex again too to lose this breakup weight. Good cardio.
Waking up naked and dehydrated has become a regular occupancy for me.
Randomize
