I'm done. I'm tired and there's a topless pic of me floating around the nation's largest 3G network.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
all i remeber is falling off a fence and banging him in the middle of the street, not sure which one gave me this cut
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
He just "revenge puked" on her kid. I think we'll be leaving soon.
You've slept with me you know how lazy I am in bed.
she drove 3 hrs one way just to sleep with me. I felt bad complaining about paying for condoms.
Immediate regret. She's like a chihuahua on crack.
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
Kristy just reminded me that I have a bottle of champagne to lick off your ass hole...... This is by way of saying that we have plans on Friday.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I mean metaphorically. Literally zombies have yet to invade. Let's be rational here.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
Randomize
