he wasnt completely random
you're right. you met him once and didnt know his name. you still dont
i get things done.
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
hey i know this is weird but does alcohol affect pregnancy tests?
We played strip Bananagrams and I won. Thank fuck I read a lot as a child.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
Eye drops are like seatbelts of being high. Think about it
Note to self don't stop having sex during an earthquake! I call it a 6.1 orgasm!
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
All I remember is the bartender saying your sucking them down and waking up on the floor in my underwear
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
I guess it's too forward to greet him with a blow job?
He punched me in the face while giving him road head, because he was driving stick. I shit you not.
Randomize
