thank you for a lively/lovely evening :)
should have blown me.
gin and tonic in a mug. no limes so im using canned madarin oragnes. classy or trashy?
homeless.
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
Chick stood right next to me in the elevator. Like she had the whole elevator and she stood right next to me. So I farted.
I feel like I need to get rid of the black eyeliner, glitter, and tequila breath before I to that world poverty conference..
I just headbutted my cat because he was trying to eat my bacon.
She gave me head because I gave her my pack of cigarettes...And you said quitting would be hard.
Dude I'm looking through my old high school year book and I circled every girl I fucked.. what was wrong with me.
AND OMG I HOPE YOU ARE GREAT WITH CHILD. COOK THAT BUN!
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
There no better feeling of self control than stopping yourself before telling your girlfriend she gives head just like her sister.
Drunkenly making hamburger helper. I just whispered "I can't wait to have you in my mouth."
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
I am downtown smoking a joint with Woody Harrelson...Because our car won't start. I will be there as soon as I can.
Randomize
