Ps there is totally a drug addled prostitute in olympic pizza asking for change for a 100 bill
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
She started to tell me how she goes to a shrink, so I started thinking how to sneak out of her place, then she said part of it was for her sex addiction, long story short she's got her clit peirced n I just got laid
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
Dude, she uses Old Spice. It smelled like I was eating out my grandfather.
he tried to make a toast, but hit the moving ceiling fan with his beer instead
Thanksgiving break drinking is a marathon, not a sprint, and i need to be well rested
After he called me a "spirited little girl" I realized that I need to stop sleeping with guys more than ten years older than me.
Can we go to Home Depot next week? Drunk Kim broke my toilet with a hammer.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Me and this 7 year old almost finished a large pizza. And when I say me and this 7 year old I really mean me.
because of daylight savings time I lost an hour of sex with an incredibly hot guy last night. thanks a lot farmers.
Can’t fucking wait for Tuesday night. Have another situation that popped up. I swear my life is like a cross between a soap opera and a porno
Apparently his ex was into edging and did it to him so much that it takes forever for him to cum
I hate you and your multiple orgasm sexcapades
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