Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
Was just hit on by a guy with 2 kids and one was named Rocky. I need to get out of Buena Park.
my math teacher staples burger king applications to failed tests
I just woke up. In the port-o-potty next to our tailgate. an hour after the game started. explain.
How far into the semester do we have to be before it's ok to get drunk in between classes again?
i'm watching the draft and making cookies. how am i still single?
Yeah someone just put a trash bag that says "use protection" on the snow penis
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
Ps I got my nipple pierced. You're just gonna have to accept me for the tool I am and I don't wanna hear any shenanigans.
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
rigging a system to keep my jello shots cold in class. important election day work.
Then that means he's outwardly conservative. Inwardly he's a total gay horndog. He's like a spy that can ruin conservative plans.
I want to change all my life goals to that.
It was a great idea to buy that cocaine while dressed as an elf. It snowed all night for me.
There are flour footprints all over the house. Either u guys are trying to pull that Paranormal Activity shit on me again, or u got drunk and tried to make pancakes.
Today I made my parents proud-spent the afternoon floating around in their pool drinking beer-which I would ask my nephews to get for me out of the fridge
Randomize
