Just try to make good decisions...remember our convo we had about morals the other day?
Turn them off?
Pretty sure that this text will cost me like $5 but just wanted you to know that I just smoked a bowl of kush, about to walk around shopping for hookers and i get 3 credit hours for this study abroad .... have fun studying for finals.
I tried douching with a turkey baster. Not the brightest idea.
You always know it is going to end badly when a guy asks if he met you at a "coed naked lawn bowling party"
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
Cooked breakfast with his mom this morning...I'm like the housewife of one night stands
Someone wrote "gnarballz" on my fridge in black marker. I'm pissed, but more concerned I slept with the one who did it
She made this little rubber cap thing that looks like a brain to go on my dick. She calls it a "penis cap". Industrial design students are weird...
Literally if she wants to make a big deal, I'd rather have shit smeared on my face.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
Did I call him? He cried after taking my bra off. You tell me.
Our faces when the strip club was closed looked like the grinch just stole Christmas ☹️
All I fucking want right now is a cheeseburger the size of my face
i woke up fully clothed with teenage dream on repeat. something is wrong with me
Randomize