ok shes still asleep, should i pee on her and say she did it herself? and by the time you respond to this ill probably have already made the decision
I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
she was throwing up and singing "I HAD a feeling that tonight was going to be a good good night." And yeah she was still in her dress.
you were asking all the dicks on chatroulette if they had daddy issues
A guy in a sombrero stopped to take a picture with me sitting on the curb.
We did nothing beneficial to ourselves, or our country last night.
She's lying on the sidewalk wailing that she is gonna die alone, with hundreds of strangers watching us, and also we lost Kate, . Please help me
Nothing is more awkward than taking a dump while someone is crying in the bathroom.
i ordered a pipe on amazon, and under recommended items, it gave me a top hat. it knows me better than my parents.
I remeber being on the roof last night and we put our heads togeather and we touched each others face and said "Hennessyyyy"
You don't realize how cold it really is...I poured my bong out the second floor window and icicles hit the ground.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
She really wants to put my dick in her mouth, and to be honest I really don't want to put it there.
She told me to take deeps breaths and I said I said YOU FUCKING TAKE A BREATH CAROL IM SURE IF YOU WERE IN MY POSITION YOU WOULD HAVE OFFED YOURSELF ALREADY and she said my name is Becky 😂
Other than the whole stab wound in my leg thing, today was pretty good. The nurses all loved me and gave me a sandwich and juice.
Randomize
