Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
Facebook really needs to add a bikini picture profile tab for girls, it would really save me countless amounts of time!
So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
I'm drunk and I'm watching it's Alwyas Sunny and eating candy. Even I am jealosu of my life
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I am trying to think of a way to tell him about thanksgiving and the following weekend in a way that makes me sound funny and exciting and not like an alcoholic
We need a fire pit. Meat. And a keg.I mean like a cow we just carve from. And cook it. We can use the milk from the udder to make White Russians
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
I am no longer drunk enough to crave tostitos
Never go drinking with anime club. End of story.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
just had sex in a stairwell with six feet five inches worth of drama
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