Got a toothbrush?
im dirt poor will suck dick for halloween costume
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
She grabbed both of our dicks in the pool then said repeatedly, "this is my dream, this is my dream,"
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
And then I went through the chix filet drive through for breakfast in all my republican post sex glory
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Her tits are so fantastic they gave him a panic attack.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
