So I walked out of my room and there was my brother....standing naked
wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
its like an ocean threw up right in your lap
I just found a pubic hair on my dick that wasn't mine.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
And my cat won't make me food. She's a bitch
Cock is NEVER random. You may quote me on that.
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
I think I ripped my underwear last night doing drunk squats
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I'm so drunk and angry about the Michigan game the fact of my relationship being over doesn't matter
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Yeah. I hurt his pride. But he's not over it. And by it I mean me.
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
