I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just had sex in a cardigan. Made me feel old. Smarter somehow, but old.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
Remember when you tried to pay that stripper to cry on stage?
I shouldn't have to say "get your balls off my counter" on a Wednesday.
I thought he was walking around the front. I just hit and run my booty call. I'm the worst non girlfriend ever
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I have to answer enough questions about you, I don't need your uterus tossed in the conversation.
They left around 10:00 this morning. I've been naked since 10:01.
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Kyle passed out in the tub after breaking a glass and shouting, "WHAT ASSHOLE GAVE ME A GLASS?" His girlfriend gave it to him...
We are back but we are listening to stairway to heaven in my car. Amy is air drums. Be back when it's over.
I just remembered that I insisted everyone watch porn together last night.
Randomize
