I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
I would kind of like a job that starts at 10:30 and i'll work til 7. I'm not very productive in the morning. My main focus is not puking from 9-11.
i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
definitely just fell out of bed trying to plug in my phone. when did laziness start getting painful?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
It was ths the worst 15 minutes of my life. . . It was like fucking a warm stick of butter.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
And that's why we do second round interviews for possible roommates.
I was like kind of drunk but mostly just very enthusiastic about beyonce
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
The uberlube is also flammable
Yes but funny for a 45 year old hell bent on reliving her college days by giving body shots and hand jobs. Not necessarily in that order
it's gotten to the point where I just look in my closet, think, "which article of clothing behaves most like a towel?" and then just go with that
Good to know. If our sexting moves past early 1900s vernacular, I'll be sure to use that once or twice.
Randomize
