Just fell off a train. Bad.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
And my awkwardness continues. I felt the need to send him a text that said roar. I did it.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Her eyes are really red like she jus got out of the hospital and shes coughing ...80 ppl at her school do have swine flu dude
So your saying just a blow job?
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
like we started out all organized and composed and within thirty mins people were throwing up in the bushes, arguing over a beer bong and jumping in the pool with their clothes on
we did rock-paper-scissors to see who would find out if you had alcohol poisoning
We're all in the kiddie pool on the porch. Fully clothed. Watching porn. With my manager.
Apparently, I showed up wrapped in caution tape and immediately jumped on the stripper pole and started making very sexual gestures at the birthday girl. We lasted ten minutes.
At least now when I say "never again" the likelihood is that it won't actually happen again the next weekend...that my friend is called growth
I've decided I'm going to drink again. More. Day drinking. Night drinking. Everything. It's the responsible thing to do since I'm not pregnant
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
Thanks. I just smoked a bowl topless so I'm in heaven right now.
Randomize
