I'm trying to bond with my sister... Its like getting to know a person I never met that I don't like
If I see one more commercial for The Secret Life of the American Teenager, I'm going to punch the next teenage girl I see in the uterus and scream, "Wear a condom!"
i dont mean to point any fingers but there is a lot of urine in the kitchen
It's not every day you get to see a girl fuck herself with a pickle.
you were crying while pretty ricky was playing, what did you want me to do
right before he passed out he said "take care of your tender spirit"
It'll be like a meth lab. But with jello.
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
These bathrooms are miraculous. I'd love to have sex in here. Wow. I've peed 5 times.
Yeah, but he has adorable dimples and dimples talk me into things.
I've counted four places at work I need to get laid in. Come help me accomplish this.
Hey, I'm your guy
You are the best. Or certainly adequate for tempering my unholy desires.
That's the nicest thing you've ever said to me.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
dude the water is back on, you can stop shitting under the tree . . .
Randomize
