I woke up in a house cuddled up with a beagle on a futon. have no idea who anyone is but they all call me stretch. yeaaahhh boiiiiii
Here. I am here. I do not know where here is but it includes condom balloons, a keg castle, and a shaved goat. Do not find me...I am in post blackout heaven.
how do you feel about lunch break shots ?
I'm still tasting pancake mix. I think this may actually be a serious medical problem...
Do you think he stole that soccer trophy that he gave you for the "best sweater award" from his five year old son?
trapped on the roof of the strip club. help
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
My kids are NEVER playing in the park more than 2 feet away from me until they are capable of punching an eagle.
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
After the keg stand you collapsed, hit your head on the floor, started seizing and after 20 seconds got back up and said "hah, I remember my first beer"
Watching this game makes me realize that we have yet to do Skype shots. What kind of long distance alcoholics are we?
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I found Erin. She's getting a back massage from the coat check boy and drinking all his whiskey.
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
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