Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
she needs to go suck a dildo, because she isn't worth a dick
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
are you looking for your table cloth? Cause I found it around my neck this morning...
what the fuck. my fiance told me she called our wedding band last night and told them to perform "best i ever had" for our first dance
The best time of year to be high is WHEN THE KING CAKES ARE HALF OFF BECAUSE MARDI GRAS IS OVER YEEEEEEEEEEEEAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
They are literally fucking next to the DJ Booth to a techno Remix to Pacman. She is going waka waka waka. WHY ARE YOU NOT HERE FOR THIS?!
Blowjobs in the shower are a lot like blowjobs not in the shower. Awesome.
At Grandmas for dinner. She is drinking a smirnoff ice. As soon as I saw it I had to stop myself from yelling chug.
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
Oh my god, are you sexting me while watching the Democratic debate.
100%
Now I'll never know if it was me that got you worked up, or Bernie Sanders' social policies.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
Randomize
