I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
I think I am the only girl in the world who would be proud of these scars from rug burn.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I got rejected. By another girl. At a red light. In front of seven shirtless cyclists in the middle of the night. How is that normal?!?
This theraflu would make for a great margarita.
I can make a sudafedarita
This is home. And home is where you find your family. And you try not to make out with your family.
I never thought wine and chicken nuggets would end up being a thing that I did, but here we are
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
So this is what it's like to wake up with someone else's blood in your nose...
Just spent the morning washing Bailey's and Guiness out of my clothes -_-
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
Why is everyone giving me a hard time for drinking?!
Your in the library.
Randomize
