he's going on about how he's going to treat me right and wants to let himself be in love with me and spend a lot of time together. kids these days. like its not about sex anymore. i'm confused.
I've come to notice a late period isn't as exciting when you have no reason to worry
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
She wants out first dance to be to 98 degrees i do cherish you...remember how i said we didn't need open bar....
both the worst and best vomit ever... it was extra chunky and thick cause of the sausage... but it also tasted like delicious sausage... also cause of the sausage
he ruins everything I try to do including his roommates
She stole my hamster. idk who she was, she just walked in and said she knew Keith so she stayed, drank 6 beers, and then stole Charles.
You passed out while holding my hair during a blow job.. i think your gona have to earn back blow jobs
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
Well the hawks lost... so, of course, the only logical course of action was a bonfire in the middle of the street.
Yes ma'am. I'm attracted to unconventional people, you know that.
True. I can't judge, half of my sexual partners I only know a false first name & a number. We all have our kinks.
i got kicked out of the casino for drunken disorderly conduct because i kept stumbling into old people and one of them told on me. as the boucer was taking down my information so i could no re-enter i ripped my id out of his hands while yelling fuck you.
Randomize
