Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
I guess i tried to text 911 last night with "someone stole my bong." Thank god that doesn't work...
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
i just realized i've hooked up with every boy in this taco bell
That's the classiest thing you've ever said.
we were so high we made up an elaborate backstory because we were paranoid about going into the wig shop w/o being serious wig shoppers
it felt like the flash was giving me a handjob
Banging your ex-girlfriends best friend 3 days after you break up is like saying "fuck you" with feeling. I wouldnt have it any other way.
he likes to slap my ass alot untill he missed and hit his own balls poor bastard kept on going.
Dude so help me god I WILL weigh a penis one day
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
OK... But I need to shower first because I'm covered in stuff I definitely shouldn't have slept in
Everything isn’t always sunshine & rainbows. Sometimes there’s tequila.
She grinded so hard on my face that I've got rugburn on both eyelids
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
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