his personality makes his face look like an asshole.
My freaking DENTIST just commented on my hickies. Through the novacaine I managed to mumble 'It was my birthday' and she smiled knowingly.
You stood up gave the stripper 15 ones in a wad, hugged her and then sat back down.
Running errands with mom, cool. Coming to pleasures with mom for her valentines night, not ever in a million years cool.
Get your clothes on you are our DD for the night. The usual three way payment
I wanted to get all my legit stuff out, but then I decided I didn't trust drunk me with my own things
Good decision.
ok I know you arent happy with the way we ended but paying someone to pass me an STD is TOTALLY FUCKED!!!
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
I danced shirtless on a platform with a fucking stripper who went to MIT
im shaving my vagina and listening to frank sinatra, im coming over after
I think my moral compass just broke
One day when i undoubtedly need an intervention please let it include lightsabers.
I think I can handle that.
My alcoholism is old enough to drink.
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