I miss Michael Jackson so much sometimes
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
I'm not sure which one did it but one of them fucked the kink out of my neck
I think I just saw my 8th grade band teacher trying to pick up a hooker
While we were making out, he kept yelling at me for not coming to his wedding last month.
Come over so we can hookup and eat tacos. Those are 2 things you can't possibly turn down.
Ginormous penis in the breeze, cumming champagne showers into your eye
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
I just wanted to let u know that I called the taco people and informed them what the fuck is up.
sex, shower, sex, ice cream sandwiches?
There's Dick Pix, Zorro, and The Little Engine that Could. I nickname my fuck buddies for the exact same reason why you don't name animals which you will one day have for dinner.
I'm about to turn myself in when I'm less hungover.
Come home, I'm drunk on the porch and pretending to smoke breadsticks like cigarettes. Enticing, right?
well, unfortunately the rug burn lasted longer than the actual relationship
Randomize
