I know, he also has a fancy car to make up for his tiny penis
It's a law of Nature, girls naturally hate eachother. It's only when there's no competition for a mate that they can hate each other a little less and then are appropriated into the "BFF" slot.
The university put out a message about those missing salt and pepper shakers... You should at least give back 60 of them.
I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
My birth control alarm gets more depressing every night.
Have you ever seen a midget fist pump? BEST. THING. EVERRRRR.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
He sprained his penis one time
He was "naked wrestling" and fell off the couch and landed on his erect penis
He's the stereotypical redneck. He tried to go kayaking during a storm and almost got into a fight when a park ranger tried to stop him
My sober self will be embarrassed tomorrow. For now I am laughing my ass off.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
69'd by candlelight when the power went out.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
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