Omg. Never. Take a laxative the day you are going on. A date.
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
So i just got diagnosed with swine flu. im at walgreens looking like shit and this guy keeps staring at me. Im so gonna cough in his face.
well, dont
I didnt. i just coughed then looked at him menacingly. he got it.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Nothing like a Mormon bachlorette party to make you feel slutty
My mom is helping me re-arrange my room to make New Year's more hook-up friendly
My sister came home, pulled two nalgene bottles of jaeger-bomb out of the fridge, changed out her 3 inch heels for 6 inch heels and left in under 3 minutes. I've never been more proud of her.
Just fucked in a kitchen. I never want my penis that close to knives, stoves, or blenders ever again.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I wound up gambling on giant connect four with the bartender. I think he saw my boobs.
You made out with him a lot. Almost as much as you told everyone Paul was the zamboni guy.
I was wondering why are people staring at me til I realized I was bra-less with a lei around my neck
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
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