i was so high last night while i was driving i felt like i was riding a bike with no pedals
Hey got that picture this morning. 1. clean your room 2.what happened to your nail? and 3. your penis is amazing,.
Friends help friends remove their foot from the sunroof after an epic smoke sesh.
I will cut you
Oddly enough thats the second time today someones said that to me
Put that in perspective
He used Kanye West lyrics to justify what happened and I accepted his logic
apparently my new 420 ritual is to look at the clock at 4:20 and realize i'm already too high
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
Two really nice girls helped clean the taco out of my hair.
He said he could outsmoke me so I challenged him to a weed duel. I don't always very competitive but when I do...
How are you feeling this morning?
Well, I just found day old puke in my bra, so I've been better.
Hey beautiful no judgement but why is there a bucket of KFC chicken in the bathtub??
He sent me a flaccid dick pic from the bathroom at the bar and he said I'm sorry it's not all hard and good looking. Props to him - I did ask for a pic.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
I don't think it's a coincidence that the day I just happen to do the splits at the gym I come back with 7 guys' phone numbers.
Randomize
