I told her I was pledging and she immediately proposed to give me head in the bathroom. i love how easy rushees are
Well maybe next time you won't tell me to do whatever I want.
theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
The girl next to me in class is taking notes on woman's suffrage with a girls gone wild pen.
hey dont come home for a while, moms drunk and is telling the story of 'how she met dad at that orgy' again
It was like she tried to cover up all the weight she gained with a fake tan...
I think that the jello shots in bowls is where it all went wrong.
Just walked into the bar to find a guy in a Boba Fett helmet leaning casually against the wall, texting. This night just got real.
A talk about Arizona woman's rights politics has never turned to sex so quickly before.
For Halloween this year I'm going to paint myself in gold, wear a golden toga and sash saying " cunt goddess"
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
I need to stop getting drunk and telling people it isn't "about them."
I'm definitely single now but she stole my mailbox
Looking back, we probably shouldn't have chased alcohol with more alcohol
How much beer/TP for a BJ? Trying to set my new rates.
Randomize
