We walked in and the first thing we heard was, "OH SHIT! White chicks!" Naturally, I made some new male friends.
you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
I'm in the laundromat a drunk armenian guy keeps trying to help me fold my laundry. Ah i'm going to miss queens.
all you kept saying from the spare room was "can you bring me a puke bowl...and the cat"
THAT stays in the CAR. And if one fucking person who was NOT in the car brings it up, I will KILL you. Thank you.
..So we should take it off Youtube?
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
No, I know her type. Tall, lanky, uses teeth when giving head, and runs like a giraffe. Don't do it man..
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Walking down the street, Bro bumping to 'still' by dre. Dropped his trash on the ground and aggressively sped up when his light turned green. If you still had love for the streets you wouldn't of fucking littered. Took everything for me not to yell at him. I know you would've.
the guy I've been trying to get with saw my brother's genitals before he saw mine, so that's my life.
I moved to this city Tuesday and got laid Saturday. Still got it.
Between the deep breathing and nipple piercings , I thought I was in the twilight zone
The day I let him eat me out will be the day that Donald trump is an honest, kind, non-bigoted member of society
Only true party girls take their birth control with Smirnoff.
I'm like the kinda excited when David After Dentist stands up in his seat, screams, and collapses
Randomize
