And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
Are you going to tell your therapist we boned?
I don't remember what your face looks like..
I don't remember your face either, just your dick.
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
do you remember the combo for the lock to my pants?
My meds have diminished my sex drive, this must be what regular women feel like
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
Crying while listening to Miley Cyrus. BE GLAD YOU JUMPED THIS SINKING SHIP!
I settled on "Merry Christmas! Btw you may have chlamydia". I thought a nice holiday greeting would soften the blow
I just made my dating life into my own game show. would you like to meet the contestants? (photos not included)
I'm good. But Nutella doesn't taste as good as it used to.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
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