I want to come over to your house, give you money for liquor, fuck you, and then kick it untill I have to go home. Was that blatent enough for you?
i think i pulled off the nice guy thing too well. it just backfired later on when she thought i was actually nice.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
sorry about having a shotput competition with your microwave, seemed like a good idea at the time
As punishment for throwing up on my car, I am holding your phone hostage until the morning. You can read this message after I drop it off.
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
passed a homeless guy with a sign that read "420 vetran" we gave him a bowl of bud
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I'm beginning to worry that I seem to get along best with people when I'm naked with them.
I just got promised sex at a fire station tonight so basically all my porn star dreams are coming true.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
I miss your drunken presence, and strong odor of hard liquor and potent weed.
My dad just invited me to smoke a blunt with him. Parent-child bonding at its finest (and highest).
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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