i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
pop tarts are not kleenex
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
My tits are coming out a minimum of ten times
I brought his matress to the living room we're laying on it listening to rick james drinking vodka
How would u feel about transportimg a penis shaped ice luge to nashville?
For future reference, the blowjob coupons I gave you for your birthday are NOT transferable to pay your friends for tacos.
The guy who bit me so hard two nights ago that I had to put Neosporin on my nipple and the guy in my bed right now are two different people. Help
I'm throwing in the towel on today. The puke gods have won this war
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Lol. I liked you the most when we were banging random girls and trying to tag team everything. You were happier then.
Randomize