ok i said sorry. what else do you want?
100 blowjobs
the only thing i can think of after seeing avatar is "when are they gonna make avatar porn?"
Is it bad that now when i read ingredients in the food I eat i only read it as shrooms instead of mushrooms ?
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
She alternated between blowing me and feeding me bites of the sandwich she made for me.
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
seriously considering responding to a craigslist ad for a lesbian cunninlingus instructor...at this point i'm so desperate for a job that i'm willing to switch teams.
i cant wait to be back in my element of drunk, on a barstool, ive missed home
i threw up in his garden in front of like five people smoking a joint. they let me have a hit after i was done so it was okay
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Costco (TM). Making alcoholism affordable!
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
You kept on yelling traitor and threatened to kill him and everyone he loves because he played beerpong with someone else
His wife isn’t coming to the wedding! I’ve got 48 hours to home wreck him. Gotta go, I have to shave my vajayjay and buy some really slutty underwear. Love you!
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