i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
You have problems? I'm 20 years old and i'm balding
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
Apparently Sundays are the worst days for your friends to get their head split open and need stitches...there's only 1 doctor on duty
Adams eating in the shower, he says it's one of his favorite places to eat. Btw it's milanos he's eating, he says he loves italy too.
there is a time and a place for ass-grabbing and that was not it.
I made him sleep with a condom on and i passed out on the carpet with only a bra on.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
It wasn't so much skinny dipping. It more like skinny walking...through a fountain.
i told him I'd let him eat part of a weed cookie out of my cleavage, so he pulled over like a gentleman.
Well, I can mark "throwing up in a daycare bathroom due to a hangover" off my bucket list.
Goddamn it. Hes got me addicted to his penis
My neighbors are white girl rapping to Hamilton again...
You were throwing up into a trash can full of used condoms. I had to intervine.
I cant miss out on a half day of work without a booty call
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