do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
probably shouldnt have written that paper while wasted, its starts with once upon a time
i tried to stop you but you kept shouting "two birds with one stone!"
He got mauled by a 200lb cement boulder and all he could say in the back of the ambulance is 'I'm so getting laid for this'
Sign #1 that I'm not ready to be a mother: I'm shopping for "maternity fishnets".
there's a picture of him beating off in the library with a cowboy hat. please steer clear of this one if you ever want to be respected.
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Apparently blowing a .28 for a cop and then kissing her on the mouth is technically assaulting a police officer. Who knew.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
She frightens me and turns me on at the same time. She's a keeper
Restraining order pending?
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
Move ovrr Titanoc and all you others. Heres the real tale of woe. This ladys failed search for boozdy goodnezs.
Randomize
