and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
I think I took your hangover as a birthday present
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
that shirt you're wearing that says "officially single" makes me think you'll be that way for a really long fucking time.
Who the hell brings a 6pack to a party. I'm trying to make mistakes.
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
FUUUUUCK she froze all my quaters inside the ice cubes again
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
You have to figure out where to put this turtle dude
Occasionally I curse my inner 15 year old when I'm fulfilling their dreams as a slut, but I roll with it.
Smoked a blunt with my dad then introduced him to cinnabon delights. Today was a good day.
Just got caught by my boss looking at porn on the work computer & he decided to utilize this time to look with me. Not sure if this is good or bad.
Just realized I've spent more nights sleeping on bathroom floors the last two weeks than in my own bed. It's time to reevaluate my life.
I love you so much and not just because your dick is perfect
He’s basically a sexual superhero. A mild mannered marketing intern by day, but a very horny 22 year old with pornstar stamina at nights!
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