Pizza is the life boat of my drunk Titanic
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
chinese tourists just took a picture of me....im pretty sure i heard the bus drive say something about shame.
I'm sorry, but the way we fuck, they don't make condoms strong enough not to break
Dude, I went home and roller-bladed into her bedroom so I didn't have a 'walk' or shame in the morning..I wouldn't talk to her unless she refereed to me as Brink
get back quick. that 17 year old who peed on your car wants to do shots.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
I can't. Currently naked covered in Nair trying desperately to catch his cat that rubbed up on my leg.
I hate that cat.
We smoked a blunt in a stall where a drag queen was fucking a bartender in the ass. So theres gonna be a second date :)
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
Why is it pressure? I want to see your cute face and possibly sit on it. You make it like its a bad thing.
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