hey as creepy as this sounds i still have your eyelashes on my desk
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
The AC broke so he ended up sleeping in the front yard and left his one night stand on the couch.
Dude, they are shaking the RV, yell at them. It feels like i'm being rocked to sleep, I don't like it, I'm not a baby.
Oh I love our desires, it's riding my bike at 2 AM with a massive erection that I dislike.
Mom just referred to a 9 year old as "this bitch", so I'd say day drinking was a success.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
The horniest man in the world doesn't want sex as bad as I want pizza right now.
Dude we gotta go back to your cabin. left glenn. he's calling me crying and still drunk
Phone keeps correcting good morning to "food moaning" and I like the way it thinks.
Hey remind me the get the pancakes out of my jacket
He told me he felt the only proper thing to do was fuck me to the top of the corporate ladder
He brought me another shot of rum, ice and my underwear when I woke up.
What a gentleman.
I KNOW, right?!
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