Do you feel that fire radiating from matt's crotch for you
Gross. gingers suck
remind me tomorrow that nothing happen between me and the guy who's shirt i'm wearing
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
she asked me where ive been her entire life and the guy in the room next to us yelled "with other women bitch!"
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
I was so stoned last night I got into an argument with your voicemail message.
Why are there so many fucking Lambchop puppets hidden around my house?!
He wins the giant teddy bear for getting the neuva ring on the dick
You can not love someone based on who they were when they were 9. Does he know how many dicks I've sucked since then?
I think one of my ovaries is committing suicide. But that is a topic for another day.
It's like everybody loves Raymond but the total opposite and everyone wants him to die
I'm drinking apple juice and champagne while watching crossroads..like the classy bitch that i am.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
U dont jog and buy condoms n bulk
Randomize
