Is masturbating to pics of your ex on Facebook considered cheating?
You are proof that most things are best left unsaid.
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
We were walking home when he passed out, we left him. Just got a call from him, hes in a jail in Canada.
i believe i can now do shots of gasoline with no chaser. its been that kind of summer.
She just referred to her vagina as "this bitch".
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You left your underwear on the fireplace
Mistake of the day: loudly discussing my gay hookups on the phone at the dmv in upstate NY... this must be what leprosy feels like
I was fucking trucked by the swat team last night on State Street after UK won. But I got a picture with the guy afterwards so I forgive him
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
She's in the hospital because she tried to steal a toilet seat from an outhouse and fell off the bank. We're gonna hang the toilet seat by the pool.
just woke up on a lounge chair wearing a durag and holding burrito wrappers in my hands
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
You know I was thinking and I've never seen a penis in a whirlpool before
So what your saying is you dont remember trying to hit a golf ball off my chest with a 9 iron?
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